I have been struggling to help BoBo, as well as myself. My call for help has been getting louder and louder. Unfortunately, the responses were few and far between. Even the school has not been ask helpful as I would like.
Except for the two teachers who regularly respond to my messages, my emails to BoBo’s school have largely been ignored. I even tried to explain that I was trying to hold BoBo accountable (with consequences) for every missing assignment. It wasn’t until I talked to the principal that I got any response at all.
I finally received an email with the grades for 4 of 6 classes. The email was accompanied with a note that "the parent viewer will show the current attendance and grades." I responded by telling her that I check the parent viewer daily and that these grades were NOT posted on the parent viewer. In fact, I added, for 1/2 of the classes there is NO grade posted at all – not one assignment’s grade entered. To this, I did not receive a response.
It is hard not to lose hope in the face of all that is going on. It seems like my efforts to create change have backfired on me. It was beginning to feel like no one, even the professionals, were willing to help me. I was losing hope. When venting about the number of messages gone unanswered to various therapists in the area, my boss suggested that the one who would eventually return my call would likely be the right one.
The next day, my cell phone rang and I felt a huge weight lifted from my shoulders. She was the therapist that my physician had recommended from my own needs, but she knew of the "perfect person" for BoBo to work with. She said that she would give him my information so that we could get things going. In the meantime, I set up an appointment for myself to visit with her.
Later in the day, BoBo’s pediatrician returned my call. He agreed in the recommendation. Even more reassuring was that all of the doctors seem to concur that the issues which I have been experiencing with him, although normal teen issues (perhaps intensified), are just a symptom of depression following his father’s death. It seems that I am on my way to getting him some help. *sigh* At least I hope so.
I want the focus to be on him healing his psyche. I’ll trust the professionals to deal with the other stuff as appropriate after that.
That was my Friday. It was good in many aspects but draining nonetheless. I tried not to worry as much about BoBo being out with his friends. I tried not to call him every 15 minutes to see if he would really answer the phone when I called. You have to understand that last weekend really was THAT bad.
YaYa and I got busy with a game of Monopoly followed by our ritualistic viewing of Friday Night Lights. It was fun. Lots of Monopoly money and smiles were exchanged. At the end of the day, BoBo was home on time.
I took the boys to the dentist this morning. Since it is in our old town, I let BoBo hang out with his old friends. But first, I told him that I loved him, I was concerned about his depression, and that I was talking with his doctor about a therapist (who is supposedly a pretty cool guy who surfs and stuff). BoBo said, "Okay." I didn’t ask him to clarify the "okay"; I just let it go at that.
It seems that hard times help you to appreciate the good. However small, I am happy to notice when things go right…even if the "right" is only the calm before the storm. I’ll take the little reprieves and enjoy the sunshine while it is here.