1 year down and 3 to go
A week ago, I was gnawing on my fingernails as YaYa sat for final exams to close out his freshman year of high school. His preparation included 4 hours of additional tutoring focused on the exam material for Algebra, English, and Science. He ran through a bit more of his English quizzing with me but the remainder of the studies sat with him. Although I offered many times, he did not take me up on my suggestion to run through the Science material.
And in the end, he passed…but NOT with flying colors by any means.
We are told that we should expect things to step up in intensity in the Sophomore year. Apparently, if he gets through that, he will do well from there on out.
walking therapy
Yesterday, I was overwhelmed with feeling fat. Today, I decided to do something about it…
I went out for a walk during my lunch break. This was not the usual 30 minute leisurely stroll. No! This was an hour long, arm swinging, heart pumping, hair blowing sort of walk on the streets surrounding the office. And if the walk itself didn’t have a way of transforming my mood, the honks, waves, hoots, and hollers definitely did.
It’s therapeutic. I think I’ll go again tomorrow.
Mother’s Day Mumblings
This Mother’s Day was altogether different from years past. I woke up alone and overwhelmed with loneliness. While I knew that I was not exactly alone, knowing that I had received everything I was going to get for Mother’s Day already, had a way of making the day feel less joyful. I glanced at the delicate black friendship bracelet that YaYa had made for me the night before and smiled remembering his efforts to relearn how to make it. I knew I was being stupid for feeling sad, yet I couldn’t seem to shake the emotion.
In years past, this day would have been one where I was ordered to remain in bed while my loved ones pulled together coffee and breakfast for me. The intended “surprise” tended to be anything but that, with the kids arguing on the way up the stairs over who would be the one to open the door and who would get to hand me the flowers they’d picked from the garden. I think I got more joy in hearing these conversations than the breakfast and gifts they had for me; nothing beats a son’s heartfelt want to express their love.
Deep down, I know that I have it all wrong. It’s not supposed to be about my children expressing their love for me, it’s supposed to be about how I can express my love for my own mother. The fact that I wanted it both ways was troubling me — and yet for the majority of the day I could not put my finger on the reason why.
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preparations
In just over a month, I will be packing up my things and heading out to see the Grand Canyon for the first time in the 48 years I’ve lived on earth. I’m quite excited as my friend, Cindy and I plan to join a group of about 8 others who have also signed up to have REI Adventures lead us through this amazing backcountry. Apparently, it is one of their most difficult backcountry getaways and, to be sure we have a good trip, they have asked a lot of questions about our preparation and prior backpacking adventures. As you might guess, I’ve done a lot of hiking over the past few months to get ready to take on this adventure and have had a lot of fun in the process.
One of my adventures was over this past weekend. TheMAN, YaYa, and I took on Mount Manuel Trail in Pfeiffer Big Sur State Park. The park staff told us about it when we asked about a 5-6 mile hike in the park. She told us that Andrew Molera had a nice 6 miler but that Pfeiffer had this trail which was about 8 miles long. We decided to go for it – with plans to turn back early unless we can’t stop ourselves from going the distance.
The trail was challenging and beautiful. However there were segments where the trail appeared to have fallen off the side of the mountain. The soil was loose with little tread in many sections, as is noted in this forum I found later. Thankfully YaYa slowed considerably after hitting these sections as he was worried about me safely passing. Meanwhile, worried about him, I jokingly said “I don’t know how I’m going to let this boy go off to college in 3 ½ years; I can hardly bare it when he is out of my sight.”
We all made it safely down the hill. However in one section, where a fall would not have been too bad, the ground came out from under me. My leg slid out leaving the rest of me hanging onto the loose soil remaining on the trail. YaYa stood just far enough behind me to see but not be readily available to help. TheMAN came and pulled me up with my trekking pole.