Even as the eyes are closin.’ Do it with your heart wide open. Say what you need to say… — Say, John Mayer
These lyrics, heard while running, really hit home today. Broadly, the topic has come up on three occasions this week. For that reason, it seemed like I good one to bring up here.
How many times do you have something that you need to say, but don’t? The opportunity to do so passes and kick yourself for not speaking your mind.
When it comes to friends, these confrontations can be tough. You don’t want to compromise the relationship yet, by your friend’s crossing a line they shouldn’t have crossed, the relationship is already in danger.
Hold fast to this concept, before taking on a random act such as coaching a friend in weight loss, running, or yoga. It’s all good, right?
Helping a friend or family member take on such a huge life change is pretty cool. If you’re like me, your genuine want to coach them to know and love the sport is actually a way to rekindle the joy in it for yourself. However, what if they start complaining about high heart rates, pain, and the like? What if they complain when they are out doing the sport with you?
Of course, you have no way of weeding out the real dangers from those perceived in pushing to the next level. Perhaps, you put on the breaks…or suggest that they do. And what if…? What if they don’t listen to their body or you? What if they push beyond their limits and something happens? What then?
This is just one example of crossing the line that needs to be addressed when it comes up. Because if it happens once, it will happen again. Perhaps the next time there will be serious implications. Perhaps 911 will need to be dialed. I told you so means nothing then.
So I urge you, my friends, if you are one of those helping types and you find yourself feeling uneasy about how the whole thing is playing out, say what you need to say. Out of genuine caring, protect your friend and yourself.
Practice this now, for if you ever take on some sort of official teaching or coaching, you will need to insure that all of your students know that they are ones responsible for knowing where the line is and not crossing it. Life happens. But death and injuries do too. We all need be smart in listening closely to the messages being given us — whether they be from a friend, family member, or your own body. Listen. Because it’s not easy to say what you need to say.
But it could be so much more painful, if you choose to cross the line and wind up losing (a coach, a friend, or even a life). It’s not worth it.