Spaces

Over the past 3 years, I’ve made a habit out of filling the empty spaces left from my husband’s passing. My finding ways of filling the void left behind has been good. However, filling the empty is not always a good thing.

Filling the empty closet and drawer space was not necessary…but that didn’t stop me. In 3 short years, I went from one to TWO closets filled with clothes. If that wasn’t enough, I filled up a 2nd dresser as well.

Fortunately, I suppose, I didn’t spend money on most of these items. Unless it was run wear that is. Like a shoeless woman, I’ve taken clothing from anyone offering. The clothes need not fit well or even be in style. I took them anyway.

I also kept the old stuff too. I actually had dresses in my closet which I hadn’t worn in over 20 years.

There was only a small section of closet space which I did not fill. Instead, I left the last few items of clothing from my late husband sit there. I said that they were there for this boys — in case they needed a tuxedo AND grew to my husband’s height & weight AND wanted them. It’s a lot of If’s and very little sense. Honestly, I think I feared I’d fill that space with more poorly fitting clothes too.

All I needed was someone to give me permission to toss my clothes into the donation pile…

I spent the better part of the day trying on the contents of my closets and dressers for my dear friend, Wendy who has no problem telling me the honest truth. I don’t think either of us have laughed so hard in a long time.

And the conversations went something like this:

THAT went out of style in the 80’s.

Well, it might come back.

It won’t.

Or this:

If your grandma wore it, it’s not something you want to have in your closet — unless it’s sentimental.

It’s not.

Well?

You don’t like it?

No.

Me neither.

Or this:

You see, it’s actually maternity but I had a non-pregnant girl try it on and she looked good so I figured I could wear it during my pregnancy and after too.

Have you worn it since you were pregnant?

Well, no.

Then what makes you think that you would now?

I just thought you could tell me what to put with it to make it right.

Nothing will make it right except maybe pregnancy.

Really?

REALLY.

But look, don’t I look cute?

[Silence]

If I push my belly out like this?

OMG. Yes, you look VERY cute. [Gasp] HOW do you DO that?

By the end of the day, I had a sore stomach from laughing, a HUGE pile of ill-fitting & out of style clothing, and a reasonable sized assortment of clothes which are stylish (read: still in style) and flattering (read: actually fit me). In the coming weeks, my dear friend will help me find a few items that will compliment the clothes I already.

As for the empty space: I think I’ll just close the closet doors for now.