Time’s up

Early in the day I stopped moving to look around. In YaYa’s room was the bed that I had decided to change the sheets on. The sheets only made it halfway off before I got sidetracked with YaYa’s laundry and had not returned to finish the bed.

In my bathroom, I had removed items from the shelves and drawers to clean off the surfaces and dispose of out of date products. I believe that I had gone into the bathroom to empty my bladder and ended up doing the cupboard when I was replacing the roll of toilet paper.

Tom’s computer was turned on to retrieve his writing from the hard drive. The computer has been on the blink for years but we just had not gotten around to removing the documents. As for this task, I did not get past turning the computer on. I’ll turn it off after I finish writing this post.

With all of the half done jobs brewing in the rooms of my home, it is a wonder that anything was accomplished today. In between starting projects, my home phone and cell phone fight for a place by my ear. Between Tom’s 5 siblings, my 3 siblings, parents, and the employers, my phones are always ringing.

Like YaYa and BoBo, I have my ups and downs:
In the dentist chair, I closed my eyes and saw Tom’s blue eyes staring back at me. I stared back for a moment and took in the memory as my teeth were cleaned. By the time the cleaning was done, the staff had all come in one by one and two by two to give their hugs and regards.

Apparently, someone reads the obituary section of the newspaper. Tom and I had about 10 years of history with them so they all wanted to find out what happened. I was on the verge of tears, when I ditched out of the exam room. I asked if the dentist could call if my x-rays showed anything of concern.

A few doors down, I was to meet up with Julia and Dottie for lunch. They are the old neighbors of ours that Tom and I should have invited over once we got settled into our new home. But we never did feel settled – and they never did get invited. Even now, as I make some of the changes that we had always wanted to do, I wonder if I’ll ever feel “settled”

I shed a few tears meeting up with Julia and her father in law. I always called him “Mr. Bill” and Tom always had a special fondness for him. They would argue politics and discuss literature. While he can’t relate to suddenly being a single parent due to the death of a spouse, Mr. Bill does know what it like to lose a spouse. He invited me to cry on his shoulder anytime. I may have to take him up on the offer; he has a nice shoulder for crying on.

The lunch with Dottie and Julia was so nice. We talked and talked. Since it has been two years since we moved from the neighborhood, there was a lot to catch up on. They didn’t come out and ask about Tom’s illness. Instead they waited for me to offer the information. Our visit was a little bitter sweet. We laughed a little, let our eyes well up a little, and talked about kids, books, and life.

Nearly three hours later we were just getting back. My time was up. I drove home to get YaYa at school. Although I had packed by run wear, I never did get time to run in them. For not working, I sure am keeping busy. It isn’t a real productive “busy” but I am moving forward one day at a time.