I felt like I was certainly losing my mind (in addition to various other items). Every time I discover that I have lost/misplaced another item I feel that I, myself, am “lost.” I ask, What has happened to ME?, and wonder when I will finally have it together again. I so want to function normally again.
Today’s critical, yet lost, item was my sunglasses. Take it from me, sunglasses are a widow’s friend. These particular glasses replace the ones that broke on Sunday. I purchased them just in time for yesterday’s funeral.
As I drove around town, dropping off Lucky at the kennel first and then trying to orient myself enough to drop BoBo in the old neighborhood, I got more and more turned around. I was LOST. I began to cry and there were no sunglasses to hide the tears. BoBo reached over and put his hand on my shoulder.
Somehow, I managed to get to work. I felt overwhelmed with the task at hand. My project needed to be in ship-shape for the hand-off. Although I didn’t have much hope of running at lunch, I had my bag in the van just in case. I wasn’t sure how I would get my work done before the day was finished let alone a run. I *would* manage; I was confident of that. Knowing that when I left the office today, I would not be back for over a week was motivation enough.
Back at home, the suitcases sit half-filled. Our vacation hasn’t seemed real amid Father’s Day, Camp Kesem, and Tom’s Birthday. We’ve just been crossing off days on the calendar without any bit of excitement. Now that it is finally here, I am content to be a little overwhelmed at work. I am looking forward to relaxing again and seeing smiles on my son’s faces. I am looking forward to seeing Tom’s oldest brother again too.