I’ve needed my runs more and more. In some ways, my emotional state is getting better, and in other ways it is getting much harder to get through the days than in the beginning. But in general, my runs have been going well. It’s the finishes that have been tough. Today was no exception.
I ran along, thinking of the day and the importance that it has had for Tom and I for the past 21 years. “Good Friday” marks the date when Tom and I first kissed. In many ways, Good Friday has been more of an anniversary for us than our wedding anniversary.
This day couldn’t come and go without my remembering what made it special for the past 21 years. LOVE. I ran along thinking of that day on the beach and the uneasy feeling that precedes that first kiss. This was the beginning of the good memories. As I finished off the run, I remembered the last kiss. It’s hard to believe that his life is over.
God that is just beautiful juls. and so hard.
Juls, each time you write of your feeling for Tom, you are honoring him, your love and your marriage. You are keeping his memory alive the best way possible.
I love that! Now that you are having more and more time to think, you are having to make more adjustments, sort more things out. That’s really cool that our love will never die, and there are things left for us to do in this world, so we carry on.
On this morning’s LSD run, we found a penny and I talked about pennies from heaven. I mentioned how my dad had made me more aware of pennies during his last year of life. We began talking about loosing those who are so close to us. I told them in the last tough miles of any LSD run or marathon, I can almost invision my dad’s hand on the middle of my back, helping me along. It keeps me connected to him. Tom is there…
Remember there will be many more kisses in the dream. They will come and will feel so real- and when the dreams finish, where will be tears at first but through time, you will smile when you wake up.